I will say this in the best simplified way possible: Living + mental illness =out of control. I felt, unable to control my moods. It was alien to me that I should at least try to recover my mood. Trying to do that is like trying to shake hands with a lion. The time I spent within the four walls of my bedroom surrounded around me the terror I felt–I used and still use alcohol to medicate these feelings. I say 'still use' because the last time I touched alcohol was last night, at a party. The flashbacks I experienced as a result are haunting me.
The unheard stories about suicide attempts of a friend who lives with depression, woke me up to the reality that bipolar disorder would not go away. I would never heard of these stories if it weren't for her being absolutely smashed out of head just to feel something. Bipolar will always be part of me, and at this time in my life, still young as I am writing these words, I want to be free. Free from the illness. Alcohol allowed me to adopt another identity: I am an addict. And that seemed better than being bipolar.
After much deliberation over the past 3 days, today’s post will be one of the best posts I’ve written to date, and the reason is simple. The soon-to-be bestselling book Truth Be Told by Lucinda Bassett, has been told.
It’s amazing how a mother can just sit down, and share a story, a story you hardly ever hear from anyone because of how personal the subject is. In her book she describes the pain, heartbreak and desperation she felt to help the man she loves unconditionally, and she explains how so much effort into making something right, can hurt.
Lucinda’s story explains how the professionals within the medical community had tried so desperately to provide David the diagnosis he needed to get through his turmoil, but even they could not stop what had turned out to be inevitable. The death of her husband David didn’t just change her life, it changed the lives of her children who coped with their father’s death in a much different way as she says herself: “My kids have decided to ignore it or disown it, all in an attempt to forget it. Right.” This left her no one to share the grieving process with. Also Lucinda says: “When I called my daughter to remind her what day it was, she broke into tears, got angry with me, and said, “Don’t ever bring it up again.” As you can see, suicide is heavy subject to discuss, but at some point it has to be discussed.
It has been discussed in the book how Lucinda began to accept recent events, and the first thing she did in order to move on with life was to leave the grief behind, and find a way back to life she left, and offer her services to help others. “I believe, as demonstrated to me universally and by divine intervention, I am supposed to share what I have learned with others.”
And because of this incredible woman’s story to the world, “Truth Be Told: A Memoir of Success, Suicide and Survival” will be a best seller and will touch and open our hearts to those who have been exposed to despair and pain. Watch out, this book will take international hearts by storm.